Sweet Shit Round Up
May 2020
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May is probably my favorite month of the whole year.
There’s a general excitement in the air! Spring is in full swing, the finish line to the school year is in view, and I get to celebrate my birthday.
It’s a month full of a lot of good things and I’ve got plenty to share that made my fave month extra sweet!
Video Games
- This game is so cute. You play as a child who’s accidentally fallen into the monster world and must figure out how to get back to the human world on the surface. On the journey you meet all kinds of interesting monsters and doggos that you have to fight….or do you? The choice is yours. And whatever you decide can drastically change not only the outcome but the general vibe of the entire game and all the play throughs of it after. The writing is pretty funny, the characters are memorable, and the soundtrack is *chef’s kiss.* If you like RPG turn based games that are reminiscent of the 8bit Nintendo games of the 80s this one is great. Even if those kind of games aren’t usually your thing, get this game cause the story is too good not to!
- Mario Party is my jam. My college years were filled with playing the Wii version in my friend’s basement and my after college years saw their fair share of the N64 version in the living rooms of other friends. Who hasn’t had a friendship ruined by this game? I mean Mario Party is a classic and I’m always happy to revisit it. I hadn’t played it in so long and forgot how frustrating it can be and for the first time learned how much you can really hate a computer player WHEN THEY KEEP STEALING YOUR STARS LIKE A REAL ASSHOLE! *Deepbreath* But anyway, if it’s been a minute since you played Mario Party…get on that shit, hating Waluigi is worth it.
Products
- This thing is dope. I literally just got it on Sunday and it’s already made the list so it’s pretty sweet indeed. I got a two pack of these little face scrubbers so Jonathan and I have each been using them. They’re made of silicone and have a place to slide your fingers in so you can keep a grip on it while you scrub your face. Little bit of water, little bit of cleanser and you’re on your way. I’ve used it once or twice every day this week and each time my face has felt baby butt soft afterwards and I haven’t personally noticed any irritation or redness. Jonathan has more sensitive skin and uses it once every day and hasn’t had any roughness pop up either so do with that info what you will. This thing is a great alternative to those more expensive vibrating face scrubbers if you don’t mind using a little elbow grease to get the job done!
- Clogged pores are my mortal enemy. I got that oily skin, and while I’m ever so grateful for the lack of wrinkles that grants me, my pores are like whoa. I had never used a blackhead extractor before but I got this set for my birthday and tried it out immediately. Watching Dr. Pimple Popper or any of those squeezing videos you might find on the gram or youtube has never been my thing, but the satisfaction of seeing that pore gunk build up on the extractor WAS mildly satisfying. This set has 5 different tools and a small pamphlet to explain what each one is best used for. Plus it comes with this convenient case that you can throw in your bag should you ever need to extract on the go. Highly recommend.
- Jade has been used to help with face puffiness, blood circulation, and relieving facial lines in China since the 7th century. But millennials only discovered it about a year or so ago which means they’re fucking everywhere now and that’s why I figured I’d give it a shot. Mine came in this nice box with a magnetic closure but the inside kinda makes it look like you bought some kind of sex toy with the “especially for you” script written up top. It’s a choice. But otherwise this thing is super nice. The roller is hefty in the hand and feels more expensive than what I actually spent on it. Real talk…I haven’t noticed much of a difference in my face at this point but I feel fancy using it and I’ve been keeping it in the freezer as a cool massage treat.
- After all that talk about getting your skin right with Jade rollers and blackhead extractors, let me talk about something for those days when your skin is like lol fuck you I do what I want. Look at these things! They’re huge! I’m hardly ever even out in the sun anymore (thanks covid) but I’ll be honest, I got kind of influenced by a local radio host I follow on Instagram (shout out to Kelly from Star 100.7) and I couldn’t help but buy them. Listen, they are kinda comically big but the more I wear and look at them the more I kind of love them. Though they’re big, they don’t feel heavy and the lenses are nice and dark. You can def wear them to cover any blemishes, hide a hangover, or look hella cool running your errands. They do kinda give me those rearview spy glasses that you could win during school fundraisers vibes with how wide they are but personally, I call that a pro.
TV Shows
- Oof. I’m not sure there’s a better opening to talk about Beyond Scared Straight than that. You might remember the Scared Straight doc from the 70s or when MTV showed a Scared Straight special in 1999 (please enjoy a mash up of the ‘99 special and a joke by comedian Tom Segura down below.) This show follows the same premise. If you don’t know about it, Beyond Scared Straight follows misbehaving/promiscuous/gang banging/partying/etc. teens who are sent by their families to jail programs that allow them to experience what jail or prison might be like should they continue down their path. Ya’ll. This shit is cray. You got inmates nose to nose screaming in the faces of 14 year olds. Taking their shoes. Saying the most outrageous and crazy ass things that I can only imagine would have my ass buggin out in seconds if they were said to me. It’s wild, it’s overwhelming, and plenty of people say this kind of program doesn’t really work but I can tell you one thing…it sure is entertaining.
- Why does the world of the Purge assume we’d all be murdering one another if crime were legal for one night? Cause I promise you, I’d be too busy stealing shit to care about killing anyone. But I digress, The Purge series on USA network is one of the better series to come out in the last couple of years and I think it’s a lot better than the original movie (which is all I have to compare it to cause I haven’t seen all of the sequels.) I watched season 1 when it came out in 2018 and loved it. It followed a group of people whose stories eventually intertwine as they try to survive purge night. Season 2 aired in the fall of last year and we followed a different group of people from one purge night, through their planning and development, and into the next purge night. We ended up taking a 5 month break on the show by accident so we only just finished the last 4 episodes this month and it just made me want to watch the series over from the beginning again. UNFORTUNATELY, I just found out while writing this that the show got cancelled this month too….to which I say, USA…da fuck? Go check out season 1 on Hulu anyway and maybe we’ll get them to change their mind.
- I know I know, I’m late to this trainwreck but, thanks to my friend Steve’s recent obsession with the whole 90 Day Fiancé franchise in the last few weeks, I’m finally here. This show is incredible. I’m only two seasons in (3 & 4) but Jonathan and I are both hooked. While I’ve found a majority of the Americans to be kind of the worst, the show itself is both entertaining and interesting to watch the way cultural differences can impact a relationship. It’s almost impossible not to binge any show from this franchise which includes the original 90 Day Fiancé, 90 Day Fiancé: Happily Ever After?, and Before the 90 Days just to name a few. I accidentally got my mom hooked on the most current season of Before the 90 Days after she saw half of the first episode and now needs to know what happens when the Americans meet their long distance loves. If you’re looking for some decent trash tv, this franchise has got you covered!
- How long has it been since you watched your favorite episode of Are You Afraid of the Dark? A while, right? Same. That’s why we busted out my old bootleg DVD set of the show this month and watched a few seasons. Are You Afraid of the Dark still has one of the best opening sequences of any show in the past 30 years and I’ll fight anyone who disagrees. The episodes, while less scary than I might have found them when I was 9, still deliver on that nostalgia factor and real shit, the Nosferatu looking motherfucker from season two’s “The Tale of the Midnight Madness” still looks like a total creep. It’s bullshit that the series still hasn’t made it onto any streaming platform yet (that’s one for the Goosebumps franchise which already streams on Netflix) but you can pay for individual episodes on Amazon Prime.
- Netflix just dropped the Big Flower Fight on May 18th and if you’re into the Great British Baking Show but want just a little more edge, then check out the Big Flower Fight. Every week the contestants are tasked with making giant plant/flower sculptures on the quest to win the Best in Show ribbon. Co-hosted by my girl Natasia Demetriou (What We Do in the Shadows,) the Big Flower Fight showcases contestants that are full of some larger than life characters like Henck and Yan who not only kill it with their sculptures but with their fashion as well. This show is great background noise and perfect if you’re looking for simple and colorful show to just chill to.
- Brits just do things better, amirite? For a people who are often stereotyped as prudish, they sure do feel fine with full on nudity (for men and women…equal opportunities!), gore, and a shit ton of swears which would have people grabbing their pearls in the states. While I’ve def watched my fair share of British shows, this month, Jonathan introduced me to Skins for the first time and ya’ll, I love a good teen drama. There’s a grittiness to the show that makes it feel more real than a lot of other teen dramas and the characters feel like someone you could know which makes you feel more invested into what happens to them. The cast cycles out every couple of seasons, letting a new generation take over, and the first cast is full of faces you’ll recognize like Nicholas Hoult (X-Men franchise), Joe Dempsie and Hannah Murray (both from Game of Thrones,) Dev Patel (Slumdog Millionaire/the Newsroom), and Daniel Kaluuya (Get Out.) You can check it out on Netflix now, but if you watch it, just remember, never trust a redemptive story arc!
- It’s been a very British month in these parts. Between The Big Flower Fight, Skins, and now Love Island….my inner monologue has started using an accent and terms like ‘aggy’ and ‘mugged off’ with reckless abandon. Love Island puts a bunch of good looking, 20-something singles in a villa for 6 weeks and hopes some of them will fall in love and all of them will participate in some drama. This show airs 6 nights a week while it’s on so there are SO MANY episodes to catch up on in just one season but it also has one of the best narrators in Iain Stirling so it’s worth sitting through all of them While we’re currently watching the most recent season that aired at the beginning of 2020, I suggest you check out the first season, available on Hulu, cause the couples are more memorable and the fucking is running way more rampant. Oh! and avoid the travesty that was Love Island USA which aired on CBS last year…stick to the original!
Small Pleasures
- You might remember that one of the many hobbies I’ve picked up during this quarantine is gardening and this month we finally were able to make a decent go of it. We’ve got dirt! We’ve got growth! We’ve got like 6 different canes holding things up…give us a break, we’re new at this and we’re improvising! We’re learning a lot about what we’d do differently for the next time we start a garden from scratch but we’re also getting a lot of satisfaction fro seeing the whole thing finally come together. Did you know that peas grow crazy fast and crazy tall and will cling to anything near by? Cause they do and it’s been pretty cool to watch!
- Boba is such a simple pleasure. Tea and little jelly balls? Sign me up. It’s been so long since we’ve been able to go out, grab a nice boba milk tea, and walk around outside. So this month, we busted out some boba balls I bought Jonathan for his birthday last year, made this big ass pot of tea, and enjoyed our own cute little boba drinks without having to leave the house…even though I do miss being able to leave the house regularly. But no matter, our boba date helped bring a little joy and fun into our housebound Friday night!
Who’s your go to character in Mario Party? What’s your favorite flavor of boba or episode of Are You Afraid of the Dark? Did you try any awesome skin products this month or start a new series? Let us know in the comments below!
